the meanwhile

What a term....... well until today I did not know what this meant..but like all the terms... I found out what this meant...
perpeplexed, may be intrigue, but over all amazed... why do we need to find partners meanwhile we are waiting for the one... is it truly a meanwhile the guy or girl we are dating or is it that we are afraid of being alone and actually finding out ourselves.. may be.
But apparentely there is sucha thing as having a "lover" or a meahwhile "while" you wait for the one.. is it for sexual pleasure? is it for company? is it for trying to fill a void that the other person left or is it just for the hell of it? I don't know may be it's all of the above.
But why I ask myself do we need these specific people in our lives? do we actually learn something from the meanwhile? is it to wait for the real one? but what about if the meanwhile was the one, how would you know then...
and what do we invest in the meanwhile, do we invest emotions, sex, dinners, conversations or just the regular phone calls?
i have never have a meanwhile but then I wonder, was I somebody's meanwhile... while i was falling in love they were just trying to kill time while the one came along... I think it has happened to me more than once...
But now that i know all of this information would i go out there and try to look for a meanwhile... may be in the meanwhile let me try to find myself again.

la soledad de mi corazon

Eres tu o sere yo….estare equivocada o tal vez estaras equivocada… que soy yo mas que una cancion matutina desafinada.. que eres tu mas que letras de musica no antes escuchadas. Y nuestras miradas se juntan y una sonrisa indistinta se marcha con una mirada que dice adios, hasta luego, hasta nunca jamas espero algun dia volverte encontrar.

En esta soleda que atrapa a mi corazon destrozado.
Aquí por estos lados donde el sol no sale y la lluvia cae perpetuamente
Mientras yo te miro partir en mi imaginación
Mientras tu me dices adios
Mi mundo sucumbe ante tal desolación.

Por favor dime que alguna ves me recordaras
Que alguna ves te acordaras de mis simples canciones de amor
Lo que me duele no es verte ir pero saber que algun dia te olvidaras de miY de lo que algun dia fue..y como el viento y el polvo en nada me convertire

i have been wanting to write something about life and how it works... well what do you do when you feel that life turns around and present you with this questions that are almost cynical...... just when you think you have found the one there is the one that you have been waiting for all your life, although you can't do anything since you are taken..
what would you do then
what ?
would you leave the person you are with, to risk everything to see how the other one would have turn out? may be may be not...
but i ask myself why does this always happens when you think you are the most happy person, is it to test you. is it to test your happiness, or to test your comformity with life.. i don't know i just know i won't make the same mistake i made the first time