A CALL FROM YOU

As I await for your voice to come through a single call, my poor tormented heart aches of pain and love.
Day by day and night by night I lay awake in my bed wondering of your whereabouts, seeking within my own mind the scarce memories that we shared sometime.
I long for your embrace and for your soft face upon my bosom. I long for your sweet, sweet kiss that would send me spiraling in a vertigo of love and lust. How can I even describe the torment that lays within my soul and that is cause by the emptiness of my bed, by the chair next to me now empty. I toss and turn in my sleep when I dream of you and your love, those endless nights that would exhaust us both with passion within our blood, with lustful eyes seeking each other’s bodies, for secret places where to kiss and to caress. I would forever keep within my mind the rapid thumping of your heart as we lay in each other’s arms. It is now twelve at night and I doze off in my bed thinking of those greater days. Tomorrow I shall lay once again awake thinking of you and those greater days, once more

A WORLD FOR TWO

With her i created a world of fantasy and dreams, of everything in between..
a world that never existed. that never was there, a world intangible ... a world that nobody can see but just you and me...
as i break my dream in two and emerge to reality.... i see all of them staring, looking, ouggling, gazing.
I look down and try not to cry, I let go of you hand and let go all the fears that i keep deep inside..

i will forever love you here in the secret compartment that my heart has, in the meatime i will learn to read between the rainbows and the rain and enjoy the beauty of fog up on the mountains and in the sky.

THE ONE

how do you know who is the one?

How do you know who is the one, the one that makes your heart beat a thousand miles a hour. The one that you would give your life for, the one that no matter what happens, you will be there for them...( kind of scary statment).... who is the one...... is it our spouses, is it our friends, is it our parents, is it our children? or is all of them... or is it us? who is the one....?

questions

1. My ex is:sleeping I assumed….

.2. I am listening to:jack radio

3. Maybe I should:leave and never go back….j/k
4. I love:my family

5. My best friends are:all my friend

6. I don't understand:life ….. but it’s fun to try to understand it….lol

7. I lose:my cool now and then…..once a year…lol

8. People say I'm:reliable and a good friend.

9. The meaning of your MySpace name is:I am so out of that staff.

10. Love is:a very wonderful thing……to complex to explain, yet very simple to feel…

11. Somewhere, someone is:crying and thinking about their loved ones.

12. I will always:love with all my heart and live life to the fullest.13. Forever seems:just like a word to me…

14. I never want to:say never……

15. My cell phone is:a way of keep in touch with all my friends….

16. When I wake up in the morning:I thank god for another day and wonder on what other people are doing.

17. I get annoyed when:people don’t say what they want

18. Parties are:the best….

19. My dog is:dead

20. Kisses are the worst when:then stick their tongue all the way inside digging for who knows what……..

21. Today I will:work, work and then I will try to make my hon happy by going to some convention. (boring)

22. Tonight I:be bored out of my mind…..

23. Tomorrow I will:don’t know yet, but if it happens I will be at the mechanic..

24. I really want:
To have a new car and to go to the beach…

25. If I had a million dollars:
i will never tell anybody….and I would help everybody anonymously

tomorrow

"To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!Life's but a walking shadow; a poor player,That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,And then is heard no more: it is a taleTold by an idiot, full of sound and fury,Signifying nothing."

--From Macbeth (V, v, 19)


what is life but a brief moment to explain, to enjoy, to suffer, to smile, cry and do a million things tomorrow is not yet here and we will never know if it will ever be here until tomorrow becomes today, therefore today i will live life to the fullest that i can i will tell you that i love you everyday. I will look at the sky and take the air into my lungs and enjoy the smell of coffee while i sip it, I will enjoy the fresh eccent that your clothes exude while i hug you goodbye.... today i will dress and look at myself and tell it to the mirror, that i wish that all my lovers, and all my friends find the love that they deserve.....
Today as i walk through the park i will look at the person that is walking across the street and smile, and when time comes to eat i will enjoy my food as if it was the best i ever had...........
and while i work i will sporadically remember the memories that you and i made over this inmese planet, and i would smile while nobody else cares.
and as time approaches to go to bed i will call you and tell you that i love you and wish you the best.....before i close my eyes i will think that tomorrow is not yet here, but today oh what a beatiful day it was.... and please forgive me for anything that i might have done wrong, and if i don't see tomorrow, may the forever dream be like this where my friends find love, my foes become foes no more, and my love for you will forever grow.

los planetas del amor

Si jupiter y marte se encuentra en el cielo
Si tu corazon, no encuntras el amor que anhelo
Permiteme monstrarte mi mas preciado tesoro
aqui he guardado para ti.


Entre este mundo y el cielo se encuentra supendido mi amor
Entre este mundo de desaventuras y curiosas armaduras
Se encuentra mi corazon
Llorando por triztesa, llorando por tu desamor

Los planetas se visten de colores mientras yo muero por amores
Las estrellas celestiales se transforman en recuerdos suspendidos por el tiempo
Y tu amor se me acongoja y se me habren las heridas de ayeres
dentro muy dentro del corazon una lagrima se acongoja en el tormento
y me dejo llevar por el aire celestial que me transforma en angel terrenal.

what humans need

What do we need as humans, is it that need human contact all the time, is it that we need reassurance that we still exist. what do we need to make sure that we are happy, is it that every time we think we have everything we actually don't. May be . Why do we always want something we don't have, and when we have it it no longer matter. today as i sit on my living room i ponder on how so many people out there feel like me and how many people want to reachout to me and how many people i want to reach out to but we can't. how do we reach out to people nowadays. do we do it by email, do we do it b mai, do we do it by text...........we try to become so detach from the other persons. Why then if we want to have love and be able to touch somebody's soul, we keep on running away, we keep on running from what we really love, we get scare the minute somebody say i love you, the minute somebody says i care........why sometimes we care for people that don't care about us, or may be is it that we don't want them to know that we care...................................can you tell me, all my life i have been wondering why isn't it that another human being just reaches out and touches me right here, here.................................in my soul where it matters............................................why doesn't something write back a note and tells me that they care..............................they care about the way i feel, they care about how i really feel inside..........................................................why everytime i see somebody i want to meet they just vanish in the inmensity of the world population............how many times did i see her standing there......how many times did i wanted to say hello.......how many time i wanted to ask you what type of music do you hear while you drive in your car...........how do you feel every time you watch the stars..............now i leave this ramdom note to see if anybody out there feels like touching the soul of another human being, next time just smile and you will have touch that soul that aches to be touch. love is magic and sometimes it's in the oddest place you can ever expect it to be.........

my b day and more

yesterday it was my b day........ wow, 29 wonderful...... life feels somehow incomplete yet, i want to travel more...I want to see the world...... I want to explore the universe and I want to tell everybody about the beauty of humans and of the world......
i want to tell you how wonderful it's to stand in the rain while the song sweet home alabama is on the back ground and all you can see is the long...long horizon and the green pasture. Today it has been raining and i can not quite concentrate as my grandmother is very sick....
i want to go and stand on the rain while the tiny drops get confuse along with my tears and i wonder how come sometimes life is too short to begin living it nonetheless to begin understanding it. As i get in to my car today i would want to travel to places that i have never been and try to excape the past that makes me who i am.

a wonderful dawn

have you ever stay up all night long? have you ever wake up around 4 in the morning to run errands? have u ever just wanted to be adventorous and watch the dawn? This is the most incredible sight one can catch. when the sun is just peaking it's so glorious rays, when the sky stars to fill with a thousand colors forming this beautiful palate......Everything changes, in those instants. It is as if you are free and as if everything is new, everything looks different at those moments. Not too long ago i got to experience this phenomena... while i was on the plane i felt the morning and the sun on all its glory hitting the planes with a light so intense and colors so radiant that i thought that life had just started then and there, that everything was going to be ok. A couple of months ago i had watch the Dawn from the rearview mirror on my way to san francisco, unfortunately i never made it to san francisco but that sight i shall always remember and her holding my hand while we drove without a care........

happy........ nay

what is happiness, really, i ask of everybody what would make them happy every time i have a chance. sometimes i think happiness is like a drug.... given in small or big doses, when you don't have it you crave it so bad... this weekend was full of happiness, i had my first party @ my apartment. I celebrated with my family and friends and well it was great but then i wake up to my reality, the one that i live everyday...yuck.... well tonight i will seek once again a moment of happiness by reclining in my chair and looking for a good book online while my head ponders on why is everybody always looking for happiness..... why?.....is it the euphoric sensation? or is it that this specific state of mind makes us feel more aware of who we are? or is it that this state of mind makes us be better and do better things. but what kind of better things?.......I wonder and wonder.....

pch
ah..... the wonders of music, if you listen to a melancholic song while driving the pch highway it seems like the world is never going to end and you are in a quest to find happiness and to get a away from everthing that hurts.
the pacific coast highway is the best strech to get on your car and star driving while listening to either some sad ass songs or may be star listening to some dancing songs...
so go ahead let you hair down, blast the stereo and feel the wind in your face, going through your hair and feel how the sorrows go away, or how the memories come back....
or may be leave all the painful and sad memories behind while you can
see what new things are possible, how many new places does this highway takes you to.

now i am going drive and listen to this song....while i try to forget her.


Let It Die
( written by Feist )

Let it die and get out of my mind
We don't see eye to eye
Or hear ear to ear Don't you wish
that we could forget that kiss
And see this for what it is That we're not in love
The saddest part of a broken heart Isn't the ending so much as the start
It was hard to tell just how I felt
To not recognize myself
I started to fade away
And after all it won't take long to fall in love
Now I know what I don't want I learned that with you
The saddest part of a broken heart Isn't the ending so much as the start
The tragedy starts from the very first spark
Losing your mind for the sake of your heart
The saddest part of a broken heart Isn't the ending so much as the start

SANTA BARBARA

Quiero ver de lo que voy a hablar a hora, la verdad es que esta mañana vi hacia el horizonte y vi lo bonito que esta el camino hacia santa barbara.
Santa barbara es uno de esos lugares donde llegas caminas las calles vas a las pequenas tiendas, y luego comes en un restaurant lujoso y comodo. La verdad es que Santa Barbara es un ciudad tranquila en la cual pues irte de compras, visitar la misión, irte a asolear a la playa, caminar a la playa, andar en bicicleta y comer un almuerzo o cena fenomenal. La ultima ves que fui a santa barbara era de noche y logre ver lo grandioso del cielo y el clamor de mar, mientras me decidia a quedarme con mi ex o seguir con la persona mas adventureras.. oh my god life turn so many ways, but if you are ever in California g oto santa barbara y feel how the city enchants you and engulf you in a peaceful way.

lo que traigo por dentro

Muchas veces no entiendo que las partes de mi cuerpo forma la nada de mi alma
Que lo mucho que hoy tengo tal vez no lo tendre manana.
Realmente no lo entiendo, no lo comprendo.
Es que es tu cuerpo el que me asusta mis pensamientos.
Es que es tu maldito recuerdo que gobierna mi pensamiento.

Oh yo ya ago mar adentro, muy adentro
Donde solo se mira el sol y me recuerdo de mis sentimientos

Explicame tu angel de mis tormentos
Que es esto que traigo por dentro
Que es lo que me come dia a dia
Que parece alegria pero termina en tormento.

DINAH SHORE AND OTHER THINGS

this weekend was a mellow chill out weekend and yet very exciting, oh, my what an oxymoron. saturday felt like i was doing so much, did laundry, had lunch with my mom and sis, and then headed to palm desert.....

oh the drive was awsome, to see the desert and the sun hitting against the mountains, and those wind thingies....lol

but the best was to lay at the pool while the sun hit me and just chill while some old guy try to stare my way because i was wearing a white t shirt while swimming with no bra....( oh what i rebel...lol).

then i headed my toushy to the Dinah Shore pool party... oh there were some cute girls.. there some not cute girls...... and there was that awful band betty......hay dios mio, corro y me cubro los oidos....lol...

i danced for 2 hours and looked and some girl started to grind me and then i just had a blast... but for some reason she always comes to my head even if it's for a millisecond.. i hate that i wish i could just erase her from my mind. but i know this is life and only time will erase her from my memory...

in the mean time i ended up flirting heavily with one of my best friends on friday.. that was so weird... but yet i think that day we could have mack on.... rather yet kiss i don't know why there was an attraction that day... oh my god i am attracted to my best friend...